


Who's gonna be the first one to move?

by Neuqe



Series: Neuqe's Flashvibe week '17 [4]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Basically almost all characters appear, FlashVibe Week 2017, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Posting early, day 4: free day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-11-14 02:07:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11198217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neuqe/pseuds/Neuqe
Summary: "Cisco knows that there is most likely a perfectly valid reason why people say love is blind, but he was not aware that it could make one blind from what is right in front of them."





	Who's gonna be the first one to move?

**Author's Note:**

> Of course, when I noticed there was a free day I knew I had to do a mutual pining fic as it might be my fave trope. I wrote this before s3 finale was out so there are some differences. 
> 
> Posting early because I cannot do it tomorrow, rest of the fics I'm posting next week.

Cisco regrets a few things deeply. The more he thinks about it, the longer the list of regrets gets, and so he does not prefer to think about it.

Avoiding regretting, or ignoring the regrets, is the best way to go on in this life.

He is, however, ready to add one more thing to the ever growing list when he wakes up to a whoosh of air in the middle of the night.

He stares the ceiling of the dimly lit bedroom, and makes absolutely no effort to move. He tries to come up with a list of valid reasons why he gave Barry the key into his apartment in the first place.

Right now, he cannot make that list very long. The list has maybe one or two points on it, and they are not that valid.

“Hey, Barr,” he eventually greets him softly, even though he cannot see him.

Barry does not answer, and Cisco grows frustrated. He does not appreciate being waken up in the middle of the night only to be given the cold shoulder and silent treatment without an actual reason.

He pushes himself into a sitting position with a grunt, and he opens his mouth to ask why on earth Barry rushed in his apartment and what is so urgent it could have not waited until the morning, but he closes his mouth abruptly as he sees Barry’s face.

Even though the room is dark, Cisco can see pure panic on his face. His eyes are wide, and his skin looks paler than usually. His hair is dishevelled, and he is only wearing pyjama bottoms and a t-shirt even though it’s freezing outside. Cisco guesses it is a safe assumption to say that he only recently has gotten out of bed. His breathing is slightly uneven, which is unusual for Barry, and mostly likely not caused by physical exercise but his emotional state.

He stares at Cisco, and genuine concern rises in his chest. It has been a while since he has seen him acting in this manner. He pushes and kicks the duvets away from him, and gets up from his bed and walks up to Barry.    

“Barry? Are you alright?” He asks carefully, not wanting to startle him too badly. He seems to be enough shaken up already.

Barry is looking at him, but it seems as if he is not completely present in the moment. He stares at him, but it seems as if he could not really see him, and there is something hollow and absent about his stare.

Cisco hopes Barry is only particularly shocked about something or sleep walking.

He places his hand on his shoulder and the gentle touch seems to startle Barry from whichever trance state he was previously experiencing.

“Cisco,” Barry whispers so quietly, it resembles more of a whimper, and Cisco is not sure if he just imagined the whole thing.

Cisco has a sudden urge to hug him.

Barry, however, seems to be in much more alert state of mind but he is slightly perplexed.  

He looks around the dimly lit bedroom as if he is unaware of the place or the reason why he is there.

“Yeah, man. Are you okay? I mean, what happened? It’s 2 am,” Cisco asks and tries his best not sound accusatory.

He is genuinely concerned for him. It is not typical for Barry to act this way, and there is something unsettling about seeing Barry in this state. All of the previous frustration has disappeared like smoke into a thin air.

Barry seems to be still a little shaken up, and he opens his mouth but closes it again. He is struggling to find the words.

“A nightmare,” he manages to say, and he immediately looks at the floor instead of Cisco.

“A nightmare?” Cisco echoes with a small degree of disbelief.

He had already gone through the seven states of grief in his mind and various and terrible scenarios of might have happened to him, but he had not considered something as simple as a nightmare.

“Yeah, I had a nightmare,” Barry confirms, and there is something defensive in his voice.

Even though a nightmare is not nearly as horrible as some of the scenarios he had time to imagine, Barry still seems to be deeply affected about the nightmare, and Cisco cannot bring himself to be annoyed. He wants to help him.

“Do you want to tell me what it was about?”

He is not sure if it the best approach, considering Barry’s reaction to the nightmare, but he is guesses it is worth the shot.

Barry merely stares at him, blinking rapidly. He remains quiet but seems unsure, as if he wants to tell but he is not sure whether he should.

Cisco sighs. “How about a hug?”

“What?”

“A hug,” he repeats, “if there is any time when some best friend hugging is required, it is now.” Cisco makes a vague hand movement to refer to their situation.

He is almost certain Barry is not going to give him a proper answer this time either, but then he nods. It is maybe the smallest nod he has ever witnessed. It is barely even a nod, or a visible nod, but he accepts it.

He pulls Barry closer, and wraps his arms around him tightly and just hugs him. He has to lean on Barry’s shoulder because of their height difference, but he feels how Barry is burrowing his head into his hair and clenching to his t-shirt.

“I got you,” Cisco whispers.

He does not know how long they stay in the same position, and both of them remain quiet. It is not uncomfortable or awkward in anyway at all. Barry gives good hugs, and Cisco can feel the tension leaving his body and that he is slowly relaxing in his arms.

“It was about Savitar,” Barry whispers eventually, but he does not move, “the nightmare was about Savitar.”

“Oh,” Cisco answers, unsure of what to say, and he is unable to find the right words. “Did he kill Iris again?”

It has been months since they defeated Savitar and all of them stayed alive, but somehow Barry never seemed to get over it completely. Cisco could not blame him for it.

Barry shakes his head slightly.

“No, he killed you,” Barry says against his hair, and Cisco can feel his breath. “It was like with Iris all over again. He killed you in front of me and told me it was my fault. It felt so _real._ ”

The way Barry says ‘real’ cracks small fractions into Cisco’s heart. Barry running to him is starting to make sense slowly, but Cisco is still loss at words.

He pulls away from their embrace, and Barry looks almost embarrassed when they depart. He wants to tell there is nothing to be embarrassed about but he thinks it might make things only worse.

Instead, he grabs Barry’s right hand and places it over his chest, against the soft fabric of his t-shirt. He places it right to the place where, he knows it from experience, all psychopathic speedsters stab their victims.

Barry looks at his hand, and back up to him with a confused expression, but he chooses not to question it. It is a smart choice because Cisco is not totally convinced either what he is doing. He is making it up as he goes.

“I’m fine. No stabbing wounds or vibrating hands. Nothing. It was just a dream.”

“Just a nightmare,” Barry repeats, and stares at Cisco’s shirt covered chest. He seems to accept this physical evidence of him not being stabbed by murderous speed villains.

Cisco lets go off his hand, and offers him a small smile, and Barry mirrors it.

“Now that we have established that it was only a nightmare, I want to ask you something. And I intend to ask this in the nicest way possible. Why are you here?”

Barry only now seems to realise that he has borderline broken into his apartment in the middle of the night.

He scratches his neck and quickly smiles a sheepish smile, and stares at Cisco’s duvet with great intensity.

“I-I really didn’t mean to barge in like this. I didn’t even realise I actually came here,” Barry explains. “I just remember waking up, and fearing that it wasn’t a nightmare and I just wanted to make sure you were alright. I meant to call you, but I guess I thought calling was too slow.”

Cisco scoffs. Only Barry can think using a phone to communicate is too slow.

“And I was in a bit of a panic,” he continues, “and I guess it was just my first instinct to run here. It was not like a conscious thing. I only realised I was here when you touched my shoulder.”

Cisco merely nods, accepting his explanation. It is somewhat heart-warming that Barry wanted to ensure he was fine, even though there was no rational explanation why he would not be fine. Cisco tries to convince himself it is only because everything that happened with Savitar traumatised Barry and not because of him.

Convincing helps him to deal with his super unrequired crush on Barry. He has developed advanced skills at ignoring and hiding it, and generally avoid thinking about it, so it should not be that difficult this time either, but for some reason it is.

“I’m really sorry for waking you up only for this,” Barry says sincerely and his voice sounds small, and Cisco realises he has not said anything to Barry after his explanation.

“No need to apologize, it’s fine. I’m glad if I could help and you’re always welcome here,” he says with a small but dismissive wave of a hand.

Cisco is trying his best to dodge the thoughts of how much Barry must trust him as his first instinct was to run here, but he is failing quite miserably.

“Yeah, uh, you were a lot of help so thanks,” Barry stammers a bit awkwardly but smiles nevertheless, “I guess I should go.”

It sounds more of a question than a definite statement, and so Cisco grabs Barry by his wrist to prevent his potentially swift escape.

Barry stares their hands with a puzzled expression, and Cisco lets go of his hand rapidly now that he is certain that he has Barry’s attention.

“Sorry. I had to make sure you aren’t gonna speed away,” Cisco offers his explanation, and Barry gives him a glare.

“What?” He asks innocently with a shrug because he has a proper point with this, “you do that. I just wanted to say that you could stay if you want to. You don’t need to go.”

He is almost one hundred percent certain he enjoys making his own life more difficult than necessary, but he is ready to bury and hide his feelings somewhere deep because it really seems that Barry needs a friend right now.

“It could be nice,” Barry eventually answers, almost shyly, as if he was hoping to stay.

Cisco grins at him, and starts to ramble about all the possible things that could distract Barry from the nightmare, including eating a sandwich to watching a movie or random TV reruns.

***

Cisco tried his best not fall asleep, but they ended up watching reruns of _Project Runway_ because apparently that was enough mind numbing for Barry to forget his night terrors.

He is not even sure at which point he accidently drifted to sleep, but when he woke up it was morning and there was a blanket over him that most certainly was not there before he fell asleep. There was no sign of Barry, but he had apparently meticulously cooked him a breakfast that could feed an army.

“I’m also pretty sure he had cleaned up my apartment,” Cisco says, recapping the events of last night to Iris, who is also in the cortex writing her latest piece on her laptop.

Iris laughs, and stops writing. “At least he is a very polite house guest. Dad would be proud.”

“Yeah, but there was no need to-“ Cisco starts, but he is unable to finish his argument because he feels a familiar whoosh of air on his face, and sees Barry standing in front of him with a ridiculous huge bouquet of tulips.

“I’m still sorry about last night,” Barry says as if it would explain the flowers, and it seems that he really thinks he has something to make up for.

He tries to hand the flowers to Cisco, but he immediately pushes his chair to get as far away as possible from the flowers.

“Barr, that’s incredibly sweet but I’m allergic to-“

“-tulips,” Barry finishes his sentence for him, and there is a split second of pure panic on his face when he realises his mistake.

Barry is gone with the flowers before Cisco finishes his sneeze.

Iris is stifling down a laugh, and Cisco turns around his chair to glare at her.

“It’s not funny.”

“It’s a little bit funny,” she replies with an amused smirk.

Barry returns to the cortex as swiftly as he had left, but now he is holding a cactus that is in a small yellow clay pot.

Before Cisco can say anything else, Barry hands him the medium sized cactus. He has no other option except accept the plant.

“It’s plastic. You cannot be allergic to that.”

Cisco does not have the heart to remind him that the only plant he is allergic to are tulips. Besides, the cactus is quite nice, and he does not intend to hurt Barry’s feelings.

“I’m so sorry about the tulips,” Barry says, and starts his rapid apology ramble, but Cisco interrupts him.

“You don’t need to apologize for anything. Not about last night or about the flowers. The cactus is cool. It’s original. I haven’t had a cactus before.”

He examines the small plant, and it is merely ordinary fake cactus.

Barry smiles, and rubs his neck. “I panicked.”

Cisco laughs, and places the cactus on the table, next to his computer monitors.

“Seriously speaking, it might be the only plant I’m able to keep alive, so thanks.” He says sincerely, looking at Barry, who is smiling his megawatt smile again.

Barry mumbles something about Captain Singh, precinct and unfinished paper work before speeding away again.

“Laugh away, but don’t laugh at my cactus. It’s great,” Cisco says to Iris who looks like she might suffocate if she does not let her laughter out.

***

It has been three weeks since the nightmare incident and things have returned to a more normal state.

Barry has stopped avoiding him and giving him unnecessary apology gifts and there have been a few bank robberies and a collapsing bridge that have kept the team busy.

The cactus is a permanent resident of his table and he has named it Isaiah. He sent a picture of it to Felicity, who only replied that it reminds her of her and Oliver’s fern. Cisco does not want to know what she is trying to imply.

Cisco is startled from his thoughts when H.R places his hand on his shoulder.

“Francisco, I like you but your cookies are truly terrible,” he declares as he wipes the cookie crumbles away from the corner of his mouth. He is holding a half-eaten cookie in his right hand and glares at it as if it might be poisonous.

“Excuse me? You’re the one who complained that we never have anything to eat here,” Cisco says, and turns his chair to properly glare at him.

H.R had complained for weeks that STAR labs was otherwise marvellous place to work, but they never had anything to eat. Cisco wanted to argue that H.R did not actually work most of the time and that he could bring his own food there as the rest of them did.

Besides, they had three speedsters who could act as personal food couriers if they were bored enough. Just the other day Cisco had mentioned to Joe that he craved the pizza from that one small pizzeria from Hub City he had visited during the summer, and the next thing he knew was that Barry had run to Hub City and back to bring him that pizza for lunch.

He had some downtime yesterday evening as all the three speedsters did was rescue a kitten from a tree, and he had baked a tray of cookies in the hopes of getting rid of H.R’s constant and annoying complaining.

“Cisco, when H.R said that, I don’t think he meant that _you_ should bake,” Caitlin is trying to say it gently, but it is obvious that she dislikes the cookies as well.

“Et tu, Brutus?” Cisco asks when she throws her half-eaten cookie to a trashcan of the cortex.

At least, she has the decency to look somewhat apologetic.

“Dude, I’m not gonna lie, this is the worst thing I have ever tasted,” Wally tells him as he walks past him and pats him on the shoulder sympathetically.

Wally’s cookie shares the same fate as Caitlin’s cookie and ends up in the trashcan. Jesse and Julian are couching in the corner apparently because of his cookies. It vaguely sounds as if they might be chocking.

Cisco is not convinced his cookies can be _that_ terrible. He had done everything according to the rather simple recipe and he considers himself a decent cook.

“You all are just exaggerating, they cannot be that _bad_ ,” Cisco tries to argue, but he does not have much to work with. “Barry ate like five of them earlier.”

As soon as he says it, he realises that Barry has been uncharacteristically quiet and has made no input for the cookie discussion, even though he had complimented them earlier.

He slowly turns to look at him at the same time as everyone else does.

Barry is sitting in the corner of the cortex, and he fidgets with a pen without actually doing anything productive.

Cisco squints his eyes at Barry because his behaviour is suspicious. Wally looks mostly amused, while rest of them stare at him with doubtful expressions to various extents.

Barry is trying his best to sport an innocent smile as if he would not know the reason why everyone is staring at him, but it ends up being sheepish smile and it makes him look guilty. It is not helping his case that he is literally squirming in his seat.

“Mate, you cannot seriously think these are edible,” Julian declares, and when he notices Cisco’s death glare, he mutters an apology.

Barry merely shrugs.

“Barry, tell us what you really thought about the cookies,” Wally dares him.

Cisco looks at Wally, who looks surprisingly smug as he leans on the cortex’s wall. He is smiling mischievously as if he knew some secret that others did not. It reminds Cisco of the way Iris’ smiled when Barry gave him the cactus.

Barry swifts uncomfortably in his seat, and sends a pleading look to Wally, but he just keeps smiling disdainfully. Cisco almost feels bad for Barry, but he is too curious to tell Wally to lay off.

Everyone is waiting, and Barry has no other choice but to answer.

“They were pretty…horrible,” he eventually says, and quickly glances at Cisco before looking at the floor instead.

Wally snorts, and Cisco is quite certain Jesse snickers as well and he does not follow their logic of what is so funny about this situation. Frankly, he does not care. He is more interested in finding out why Barry lied to him while no one else had difficult time to tell their harsh and blunt feedback of the cookies.

“What? Why did you eat them then?”

Barry returns his gaze to him, and scratches his neck.

“I didn’t want to upset you,” his voice is quiet and rapid but still soft, “and you had put some serious effort into them and I didn’t want you to feel like it was for nothing.”

Barry sounds sincere, and Cisco instantly believes he means it. Barry is still glaring at rest of his friends as if indicating that they should feel bad and apologetic for making him think his cookies are inadequate in quality.

Cisco finds himself smiling softly. It is rather touching and sweet gesture, even though he is slightly pissed at Barry for lying to him and convincing him that the cookies were good.

He does not have time to tell Barry all of this because the meta human app starts ringing, and nobody has time to sacrifice one thought to the cookies.

***

“Why are you holding Isaiah in your hands?” Barry asks when Cisco finally finds him in one of the working rooms of STAR labs.

Barry is the only one, besides Cisco, who calls the cactus with its name. The rest of the team Flash have not caught up on it yet.

Cisco grins at him, and takes a chair next to Barry. He places the small plant on the table with a thud and slides to Barry.

“After Iris tasted the cookies and threatened to enrol me to _Worst Cooks in America,_ I had to taste them too, and man, they tasted absolutely horrible. I’m pretty sure that is what death tastes like, or feet,” Cisco explains with a terrified expression, and Barry laughs.

Cisco gestures towards Isaiah. “So I wanted to apologize for ever even making you eat those abominations, and I don’t know why you exactly felt compelled to lie to me, but here’s Isaiah as an apology gift anyway.”

He stares at the plant, and then looks at Cisco.

“So do we just trade Isaiah when we need to apologize?” He asks, completely ignoring his indirect question.

“Sure,” Cisco agrees with a shrug. It would not be the weirdest tradition they have developed. “But in this case it’s also a reward of bravery, and you can fully blame me for potential food poisoning. I mean you ate _five_ of them.”

“I assumed my fast metabolism would save me from it,” Barry answers with a lopsided grin.

“Aha, so you did think they were that horrible,” Cisco says with mock accusation.

“Yeah.”

Cisco chuckles, and gently punches Barry’s arm. They remain quiet for a moment, both of them unsure what to say.

“You know, you didn’t have to pretend to like the cookies, but the underlying idea was pretty sweet. So thanks,” Cisco tells him gently.

Barry looks at him strangely. There is something in the way he stares at him that Cisco cannot quite recognise. As if there is something electrifying in his eyes.

If he did not know any better, the way his gaze lingers on his face, he would think Barry is about to kiss him, but he knows better.

Yet, he cannot help but glance at Barry’s lips as he feels him staring at his. Suddenly, the whole situation feels tense and as if there is not enough air in the room. He feels dizzy, and he can hear his own heartbeat.

Barry leans slightly towards him, and it is too much for him. 

Cisco coughs, and suddenly the moment is over. The spell is gone, and everything returns to normal.

Barry leans backwards, and smiles brilliantly as if nothing had happened.

Nothing happened, Cisco tries to remind himself and compose a convincing smile.

He is rather convinced he imagined the whole thing, and his crush is just playing tricks on his mind.

“Alright I got it, no more lying about your baking skills,” Barry says in a light tone, but his voice sounds oddly strained.

Before Cisco has the opportunity to say anything Barry zooms away without any explanation and he is left alone in the working space with the cactus.

***

Cisco tries his best not to make things weird after The Moment. He is yet to find a more suitable word to describe what happened between him and Barry in the working space few days ago.

He is failing miserably. He is making things weird, and he is perfectly aware of it. He just cannot forget about it, even though he needs to.  

Cisco loathes it. The whole situation is slowly driving him insane, and he does not want to and he cannot lose his best friend because of something as stupid as his crush.

Barry sends him concerned looks during the days, and he looks like a kicked puppy when Cisco comes up with new excuses to avoid spending time with him outside team Flash business, so when Friday rolls around and it is time for their weekly movie night, he cannot no longer escape the situation.

When Caitlin complains about lack of plans for Friday night, Cisco invites her to join them. He convinces himself he is doing it because she seems to be upset about something and he wants to cheer her up, and not because he wants to avoid spending time alone with Barry.

However, the invitation spreads. Caitlin invites Julian, Wally overhears the conversation, and so Wally and Jesse agree to attend. Wally invites Iris, and at some point Cisco loses track of who is coming but in the end, the entirety of Team Flash is cramped in his small living room.

Wally and Jesse have chosen a small arm chair, and somehow both of the speedsters fit there. They are cuddling and they are rather adorable. HR, Joe and Iris have conquered almost the entire couch, and Julian and Caitlin are sitting right in front of them on the floor.

Everyone is excitedly discussing, and arguing, about which movies they should watch and in which order, except Barry.

He sits in the corner of the couch, pouting about something.

Cisco resists the urge to groan, but apparently, he has no other choice, except face his issues and Barry’s pouting.

“Barr, come to the kitchen,” he says and clasps Barry’s arm as he walks past him.

“Do you need help with something?” Barry asks as soon as he walks to the kitchen, but Cisco shakes his head.

After the cookie incident, everyone was a bit reluctant to eat anything he had made, so he chose to trust in the power of take away food and popcorn.

“I just wanted to ask if you are okay. You’re pouting,” Cisco remarks and leans on the kitchen island behind him.

“Sorry, yeah, I’m fine,” Barry starts and takes a deep breath. “I don’t want to sound petty or jealous, but I thought movie nights were our thing. Just the two of us. And you’ve been avoiding me for the past few days, and I cannot help but wonder if it is something I have done.”

Cisco cannot help but blankly stare at him, and trying to come up with a plausible answer. He buries his face into his hands and runs his fingers through his hair.

“No, I’m sorry. I have been an idiot, and I promise it isn’t because of anything you have done,” he eventually says.

It is somewhat true, anyway.

Barry, however, looks doubtful.

“Are you sure this isn’t about the other day?” He asks, and it seems as if he would be nervous. He fidgets with his fingers and refuses to look at Cisco.

Cisco is certain his heart does a somersault. Barry cannot be talking about The Moment that never even occurred. He considers whether Barry could have found out about his crush, but it does not seem possible.  He tries to control his rising panic.

“No,” he says rapidly, and shakes his head slightly too much force, “why would it be?”

Barry shrugs quickly, and then stares at him, and he still seems to be sorrow. “So we are good?”

“Yes, of course” Cisco answers and prays that Barry will not ask any more questions. He throws his arm around Barry’s shoulders. “And if you’re so keen on spending time with just me, we can have another movie night tomorrow.”

Barry cracks a tiny smile, and Cisco considers it a success.

***

The clock is closer to two, and their movie night still going on. Joe, HR, Caitlin and Julian had already left but the rest of them were still there, watching a movie.

Cisco is sure that Iris has fallen asleep on the other end of the couch. He cannot really blame her, the movie is mind numbingly boring, and it is so quiet.

He feels drowsy as well. He blames his sleep deprivation for not noticing that Barry is holding his hand.

Cisco is leaning on Barry’s shoulder, their hands are painstakingly close in any case, and somehow it feels natural that they are holding hands. It is not odd or uncomfortable at all.

Cisco does not have the energy to start thinking about it any further. He is almost certain that Barry took his hand into his and since he has not moved, he cannot think it is too weird either.

Besides, it is _really_ nice. His hand is warm and soft, and Cisco feels content and relaxed. Yet, he is tiniest bit curious.

He tries to glance over his shoulder, to look at Barry. He is still awake, but he seems to be also on the edge of falling asleep.

“I’m not complaining, but why are we holding hands?” He whispers.

Barry’s grin is lopsided. “It’s a scary movie.”

Cisco has to glance at the TV screen again. The last time he checked they were watching a romantic comedy, but he is exhausted and it is not entirely impossible that he would have missed the change of movies.

“It’s a rom com,” he whispers back, a bit puzzled.

“It’s terrifying what straight people consider as romantic,” Barry murmurs, glances at Cisco.

He snorts, but it is a valid point, so he shrugs. “Cannot argue with that logic.”

Barry hums, and they both fall quiet. Cisco falls asleep against Barry’s shoulder within minutes.

***

Three weeks later, Barry is telling the painfully awkward story of his fake date last night to Cisco and Iris in the cortex. The catastrophe date somehow involved near death experiences, tacos and a food poisoning.

Iris shaking with laughter and Barry is glaring at her. Cisco has to admit the catastrophe date sounded hilarious.

“It wasn’t that funny when it happened,” he says with a groan, “it was a disaster.”

“Poor Alice, though,” Iris says as she still snickers, even though she tries her best to control her laugher. “Why did you take her as your fake date?”

Barry tells that he had run into some woman called Liza, who had been in the same college as him, in front of the precinct, and she had invited him to this gallery opening and apparently, it was heavily implied as a date. Barry had panicked and answered that he is dating someone, and Liza had then invited him _and_ his significant other.

Alice had been the first detective he had found when he entered the precinct, and she had been nice enough to agree to Barry’s plan.

“You feel no sympathy for me,” Barry accuses Iris, who just shrugs innocently.

“This is a normal reaction,” she defends herself with a smirk.

“Cisco isn’t laughing,” Barry says and points at him.

Cisco has no intentions to tell that it is because of his persistent crush on him makes him a tiny bit reluctant to think him on dates with other people, and not because he feels sorry for him.

“Yeah, sorry, I gotta agree with Iris,” he says with a huge grin, “it sounds pretty hilarious and I’m just personally offended that you didn’t take me as your fake date. I’m a perfect fake date,” he declares and points Barry with a pen.

It is not what he planned to say, but he guesses sticking with the almost truth is the best way to get out of this situation.

Iris finally stops laughing, but the smirk stays on her face. “Yes, Barry, why didn’t you take Cisco as your date?”

There is some sort of secret that only Wally and Iris know besides Barry, it is obvious from their smirks and the way Barry glares at them every time they do it, but Cisco has given up on trying to find out what it is.

Barry seems overwhelmed, but then his whole expression softens, and he looks Cisco in the eye.

“I don’t know. We would make a good couple,” his voice is quiet, and vulnerable. The way he looks at Cisco makes him feel a wave of warmth in his chest.

His soft smile makes Cisco almost think that this is no longer a joke, and makes his heart flutter but then the meta human app alert starts ringing, and the words only exist in Cisco’s head anymore.

***

Cisco is not actively trying to get over Barry. He firmly believes that, if he just ignores everything he feels, it will eventually disappear.

However, when a cute barista asks him out during his morning coffee run, he does not say no.

He knows it is not the healthiest way to cope with things, but he is not going to spend rest of his life pining after Barry.

Zara is unbelievably nice, intelligent and beautiful and their date on Friday night goes smoothly, but something is missing. They lack a spark, and Cisco guesses she feels it too, because after the date they agree to stay as friends.

Two days after his date, it is time for their weekly movie night, and this time it is only the two of them, but Barry is pouting, again. It could be almost considered as brooding, and Cisco cannot comprehend what is the cause of his sour mood.

He presses pause on the remote control, and turns to look at Barry, who sits on the other end of the sofa.

“Talk to me,” Cisco pleads.

“About what?” Barry asks but looks at the TV instead of Cisco.

“Whatever it is that is bothering you,” Cisco says with a sigh and vague hand movement.

“It’s nothing,” he answers and tries to smile but the smile is thin and it is crystal clear that Barry is faking it.

“Barry,” he says with a pointed look. “You are my best friend. I know you, and it isn’t nothing if you have been pouting for days. In fact you have been moping ever since my date-“ Cisco says, and suddenly falls quiet.

Surely, Barry cannot be pouting because of his date. There is no reason for Barry to be upset about his date. Yet, it seems to be the only possibility.

Barry looks even more uncomfortable than before and he is twitching the fabric of the blanket that has been thrown over the couch’s armrest.

Cisco drags himself closer to Barry on the couch. He would have never thought he should have to ask this from Barry.

He takes a deep breath, and gives a reassuring smile to Barry, even though he still refuses to look at him. “Barr, I’m going to ask you a question, and you don’t need to answer if you don’t want to, but I gotta ask. Do you, uh, have a crush on me?”

It feels as if the silence lasts forever. His heart is beating so fast, he feels as if it might leap out of his chest. He thinks Barry might actually hear his heart beat.

“It’s a bit more than a crush,” he finally chokes out, and his voice is quivering.

Cisco’s breath hitches in his throat. “What?”

“I love you,” Barry says rapidly, and finally looks at Cisco. He smiles quickly, but the smile is joyless and it looks like as if he has lost all hope.

He has been yearning to hear those words, and when he finally does, it feels unreal.

“That’s why I’m upset about your date. I’m sorry, I know it’s unfair from me to be upset if you’re genuinely happy. I’m also sorry if this makes things weird between us. I’m going to get over it, eventually. That’s what I’m good at. Getting over unrequited feelings and one-sided love,” Barry speaks quickly, and Cisco has no opportunity to answer.

Cisco knows that there is most likely a perfectly valid reason why people say love is blind, but he was not aware that it could make one blind one from what is right in front of them.

Barry interprets his silence and perplexed expression in the wrong way, and literally leaps away from the couch. His expression is poignant, almost heart-broken.

“Barry,” Cisco says gently, “there is nothing unrequited or one-sided about it this time.”

It is his turn to be confused. His face is almost hopeful, but there is still slightly doubtful when he sits back to the sofa, but mostly he looks astonished.

“You mean-?” He starts, but he is unable to finish his sentence.

“That I love you, too,” Cisco finishes the sentence for him, and it feels incredible to say it aloud, and he cannot stop grinning. “Yeah, I convinced myself that it was merely a crush but I’m past that point.”

Barry is smiling again his megawatt smile, but somehow it seems to be brighter than ever. Cisco feels giddy and light from pure happiness.

“I had no idea you feel the same way,” Barry finally manages to say.

Cisco laughs. “Yeah, well, I got pretty good at hiding it, and I didn’t realise your feelings either.”

“I thought you knew. I was so bad at hiding it. Wally and Iris realised it so quickly, and made me confess.”

“Aha, that’s why they have been smirking at us,” Cisco says, realising what the secret was about.

“Yeah, great observation skills,” Barry jokes, and Cisco mock punches him in the arm.

Barry rolls his eyes. “I literally thought you realised after I almost kissed you.”

“What?”

“After you gave me Isaiah, in the working space?”

Cisco groans, buries his head into the sofa pillows. “I thought I imagined the whole thing.”

Barry laughs, and it is soft and light laugh. “Yeah, well, I thought you just didn’t want to and then you started avoiding me, so I thought I had no chance.”

He gently moves a lock of hair away from Cisco’s face when he lifts his head away from the pillows.

“I was having an emotional turmoil because I couldn’t get it out of my head and I imagined kissing my best friend,” Cisco tries to explain with another groan.

“You imagined kissing me?”

“Don’t look so smug about it,” Cisco says, but he is unable to stop smiling.

Barry’s smile just gets wider. “Can I kiss you now?”

“Yeah,” Cisco whispers, and Barry cups his face tenderly, and kisses him.

It is a slow kiss, as if they had all the time in the world. It is much gentler, warmer and softer than Cisco expected and there is no lack of spark. It feels as if something is igniting.

When they depart for air, Barry is smiling so wide and big Cisco fears his heart might explode from happiness and love.

“I have wanted to do that for so long,” Cisco blurts out, and smiles sheepishly.  

“You have no idea,” Barry chuckles.

“I’ve been tormenting myself over my crush for ages, and we could have had this for months?” Cisco whines, and makes a vague gesture between them.

“Pretty much so,” Barry replies.  

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?” Cisco asks gently, and not in an accusatory way.

“I thought I had no chance because I thought you were way out of my league, and then we both had other relationships. And most importantly, I didn’t wanna ruin our friendship.”

“We’re both idiots,” Cisco concludes with a hum.

“At least now we can be idiots together,” Barry answers with a grin, and kisses him again.

**Author's Note:**

> Congrats if you made it to the end. I have no idea how it became this long, but I loved writing this. The title is from a song called Chasing Highs by Alma.


End file.
